


Stuck in a Tub

by LadyAruofElyonia



Category: Free!, Haikyuu!!
Genre: Crack with Plot, Gen, Probably Crack, lucifer dogfish, magical shenanigains, merfic, mom-friend of sports anime teams have annual meetings where they gripe about their children
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-18
Updated: 2015-03-18
Packaged: 2018-03-18 11:33:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,925
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3568130
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LadyAruofElyonia/pseuds/LadyAruofElyonia
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>also known as "That time Hinata merged with a Lucifer dogfish and we just managed to keep it from the coaches by sheer dumb luck"</p>
            </blockquote>





	Stuck in a Tub

**Author's Note:**

> I'm not sorry. This idea came to me in the shower and it wouldn't let go.  
> Set ambigiously in the training camp arc for Haikyuu!!, sometime post series for Free!

 “Hey, hey, Shouyou don’t look so down do you want hear what I heard?”

“What is it Sou? Did you find a way to merge me with a Lucifer Dogfish?”

Partway down the hall, he thought he heard someone go “You’re still on about that?” but ignored it.

“Yeah! They say that if you eat grilled mackerel and rice for dinner, then when you’re in the bath to say ‘the water is alive’ three times and then submerge your head for a whole minute, you’ll be granted a wish by a water guardian! Isn’t it so cool sounding?!”

“Really Sou?

“Really! Kuroo-san told me so it can’t be a lie!”

“Awesome! I’m gonna try it out tonight!”

\--

It was after midnight when Hinata slipped back into the bathroom. Using the moonlight that came in through the thin windows, he made his way over to the large tub. Filling the tub as quietly as he could, Hinata slid in the water. Closing his eyes, he recited the phrase Inuoka had told him after practice.

“The water is alive, the water is alive, the water is alive.”

Hinata took a breath and ducked his head under water, slowly counting the seconds one by one until he hit sixty. Rising up, he let out a stifled ‘mwah’ at the sight of a blue scaled merman sitting on the edge of the tub.

“Kageyama what are you-“Hinata began to say but stopped. This wasn’t Kageyama playing a prank on him. The merman’s features were similar to the setter, but on closer inspection were different. The merman’s hair had more of a blue tint and was longer than Kageyama’s was, even dripping wet with water.  His eyes were also a lighter shade of blue, seeming to shimmer like the water itself.

“…”

“…”

“Ahh, uhm, are you the water spirit?”

“Yes.”

“…”

“…”

“Can you grant any wish?”

“Within reason.”

“Can you merge me with a Lucifer dogfish so I can be 2m tall?”

“I guess.”

Hinata let out an excited ‘gwa’, only remembering to muffle it at the last moment so no sempai came to wonder who was in the bathroom at this late hour.

“Then I wish to be merged with a Lucifer dogfish so I can be 2m tall!”

The merman gave him a deadpan look but nodded and unhooked a bottle of liquid from the netting draped around his waist. Putting a single drop on Hinata’s forehead, the merman recapped the bottle and stowed it away before dipping his scaled hands beneath the water, scooping up a handful.

“Close your eyes and concentrate on your wish.”

Hinata did so, tilting his head forward. He felt the water trickle through his hair as the merman muttered something above him. He wasn’t sure what it was, but it sounded something along the lines of

“Why not ask to be 2m tall then?”

And then the pain started.

\--

“Where’s Hinata?”

“He could have gone to the toilet?” Noya suggested, tugging on one sock and looking up at Suga.

“Then he’s been gone a long time. His futon was empty when I woke up.” Daichi was the earliest riser of them all.

“For all we know he could have fallen asleep on the toilet.”

 “Tsukishima actually brings up a good point.”

A shriek caught all of their attentions and they hurried to the source. Inuoka was guarding the door to the baths with a dogged determination for all he was several shades paler and brown eyes wide.

“Inuoka, move aside so we can see what the matter is.” Yaku was saying what seemed to be for the umpteenth time, giving the blocker a stern look.

Kuroo rounded the corner at that moment with Kenma at his heels, face stern but eyes with concern. He turned to Daichi for a moment, relaying that

“The coaches are out with the managers for the morning, we’re on our own till they get back.”

At Daichi’s affirmative nod he rounded on Inuoka, who went several more shades paler if he could.

“Move aside Inuoka, that’s an order from your captain.”

“Y-yes captain…”

Inuoka stepped aside and Kuroo jerked open the door.

Asahi fainted dead away.

Lev was frozen in shock, Noya and Tanaka had to shoulder their way past him before stopping with jaws hanging open.

Suga and Yaku sighed in unison, simultaneously pinching the bridge of their nose as if to stave off the incoming headache.

Daichi face palmed and let out a soft groan.

Kuroo looked whiter than Inuoka was, emitting a soft “I didn’t think it was true…” that could be heard loud and clear in the bathroom filled with silent teenagers.

Tsukishima took one look at the unconscious merman made up of his teammate’s torso and what resembled a Lucifer dogfish in the tub and walked right back out again.

\--

“Morisuke?”

“Yes Koushi?”

“Do you have The Handbook?”

“I always have The Handbook. It keeps me sane with this lot.”

“Please go get yours. We’re going to need it.”

Yaku slipped out from the room and Suga sighed before turning to the rest.

“Not a word of this leaves our teams. Yaku-san and I are in control of this situation until further stated. For now, go back to your rooms and wait. Noya-san, please wake up Asahi and take him back to the room.”

“Yes Suga-san!”

The two teams filed out, leaving only Suga and the captains inside the room, Hinata still passed out in the tub. The captains looked to Suga, Kuroo shrugging and Daichi making an offhand gesture.

“So what’s the plan Suga?”

“I’ll tell you when I have one.” He knelt by the tub and ran a hand through Hinata’s hair, dry and soft from having been out of the water all night. Hinata groaned and rolled slightly, one hand rising to bat at Suga’s hand before slipping back into the water. Suga noted the translucent webbing as well as the deep grey that had become his nails. Scales in shades of grey and brown dotted up his arms and along the slit running from ear to collarbone on either side of his neck.

“Kou, the book!”

“Thank you.” He took the book from Yaku and began rifling through the pages, stopping on a page to draw out his cellphone. A quick dial and short ring later

“Ah, Tachibana, it’s Sugawara… I’m sorry for skipping the pleasantries and making this short, but can you come to this address right away? We have a…situation. It’s quite urgent and I think you’re the best to handle it.”

\--

Tachibana Makoto was strong, thoughtful, kindly, and otherwise a patient man.  His expression was full of concern when he arrived at the address that Sugawara had given him, wondering what was so urgent that he had been called over. Most of the time those whose names were in The Handbook didn’t interact past the annual meeting they all attended twice yearly.

The door opened and Makoto raised a hand in greeting.

“Yaku-san, I’ve arrived. What is the situation? Sugawara-san seemed quite frantic…”

Yaku gave him a tired look he recognized as one from dealing with over enthusiastic underclassmen who did not know when to stop.

“You’re best off seeing for yourself. Follow me.”

He followed Yaku through the corridors and gave a puzzled look when they arrived at the bathroom, but followed Yaku through the doors. He understood the need and a large palm found its way to his forehead as he groaned.

“Haru-chan….”

The four volleyball players looked to him with varying degrees of confusion.

“If you would explain Tachibana-san?”

“Haru-chan is my friend from childhood, and when we were on a trip with our old swim club he got cursed. Of course we didn’t believe it was a curse until it turned out to be true. So now on the full moon and new moon he turns into, well, basically a merman. The wish granting was an accidental addition.” For some reason he seemed sheepish as he spoke the last part.

“So you’re saying we have to wait until the full moon to turn Hinata back?” Daichi pinched the bridge of his nose and barely withheld a groan.

“Not necessarily, we just have to summon Haru-chan back so he can change, Hinata-san was it, back to normal.” Makoto said as he rolled up his sleeves, taking the few steps forward so he was able to kneel by the tub. Gently, he flipped Hinata from his back to his stomach, sliding him down below the water’s surface. Holding him there, he softly counted to ten before jolting back as Hinata began to flail about. He got back to his knees and pulled Hinata’s torso out of the water, making sure to keep his chest down.

“There we go, it’s alright Hinata-san, everything’s fine and you’re alright now. Except for the fact you’re part shark and currently trapped in the bathtub. Actually you were alright before your gills would have kept you going but its normal to panic the first time.”

Hinata coughed twice and looked around, confused until it all seemed to click into place when he saw Daichi with his arms crossed over his chest, Kuroo with a mildly impressed look and both Yaku and Suga with matching expressions of someone long done with others shit. He glanced to the stranger that had pulled him out of the water, held up his own hand to wave him off, saw the scales and he began to panic.

“I’m sorry I’m so sorry I’m so sorry Daichi-san, Suga-san I just wanted to become taller I didn’t expect this to happen I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m so sorry!!”

“Hinata, just shut up.” There was an audible click as Hinata abruptly stoppered the stream of apologies.

Kuroo thought he heard Tachibana mutter a soft “Three, two, one…” right before the howling began.

“I’m bleeding! Aarugh I’m bleeding Suga-san! It hurts!”

“I didn’t get to warn him about the shark teeth, really should have done that.” Makoto sighed and flipped Hinata onto his back, shoving him beneath the surface. Water splashed over the edge, but it cut off the howls to soft sniffles and the occasional whimper that was represented in a small amount of bubbles floating up. Hinata stared wide eyed from beneath the surface, the slits on the side of his neck flaring as he took one breath, than another.

“Don’t worry, he’s just in a catatonic state. I wasn’t sure if it would work, but it seems to.” Makoto said with a small smile as Suga came over to dip his hand beneath the water to stroke at Hinata’s hair.

“How long until you can get your Haru-san to come put Hinata right?” Daichi asked softly as he stepped forward to stand behind Suga, not quite frowning down at the merman in the tub.

“At best we can hold off the coaches for maybe the rest of today and if we work together, tomorrow as well but…” he looked over to Kuroo who shrugged, still not having bothered to put on a shirt since he first arrived at Inuoka’s shriek that morning.

“I’ll see what I can do to get Haru-chan to come tonight.” Makoto sighed as he stood up, muttering something along the lines of “So much mackerel…” provided Daichi’s ears weren’t playing tricks on him as he drew out his phone that had a lime green case and a dangling orca charm and pressed a series of buttons with long familiarity.

\--

“Oh good, you actually picked up this time Haru-chan!”

“What is it Makoto?”

“About last night, well…“

“…go on.”

“You kind of fucked up Haru.”

“I fail to see how I did. I was doing as I was told.”

“Haru! You have to fix it or else he’s going to be sold to a freak show on the supercontinent Pangea!”

“Makoto you honest to god believe that still?”

“Well he might if you don’t undo whatever you did.”

“Makoto, seriously?”

“Haru.”

“Makoto.”

“Haru.”

“Makoto.”

“Haru.”

“Makoto.”

“Nagisa!”

“Ha-wait what, Nagisa how did you get in this call?”

“Never mind that, Haru-chan your present should be arriving for you!”

“Thank you Nagisa.”

“Haru, focus!”

“Yes Makoto?”

“Haru!”

\--

“So I’ve managed to get Haru to come again tonight, mind you he usually never does the same person back to back but he’s making an exception for Hinata-kun.”

“That’s good. Thank you Tachibana-san for making this emergency trip.”

“It’s not a problem Sugawara-san. Do you mind if I stay to make sure everything goes well?”

“I don’t, but we’ll have to talk with Takeda-sensei and the Nekoma Coaches to make sure.”

“You’re studying to be a sports medicine therapist right? We’ll get the teams to light drills and let them know of the plan, then come get you so we can explain to the coaches that you came at Suga’s request to make sure things were going well.” Daichi said and left the room with Kuroo to go organize their teams and inform the coaches of Tachibana’s appearance.

“Kuroo be sure to put a damn shirt on!” Yaku called out after the departing captains, groaning as he got a faint “Yes yes as you say mama.” in response.

“What am I going to do with him?” Yaku groaned, turning his attention to Hinata, who was just beginning to stir again. He slowly raised himself from the water, looking around in confusion.

“Wha...what was that?” He swallowed and grimaced slightly. “What’s this weird taste in my mouth?”

“It’s called Tonic immobility. You were panicking and I had to calm you down or else you would hurt yourself further. Luckily I’ve had practice with sharks before so it was fairly easy to get you over. Now, can you come over here and open your mouth?”

Hinata nodded and scooted over to where Makoto was leaning to grab his bag and rummage around inside of it. Opening his mouth, he heard a gasp from Suga. Makoto looked over and clicked his tongue disapprovingly.

“Wish I could have done this earlier. Now then, Hinata-kun, I need you to not panic and follow my instructions carefully, alright?” As soon as he got a nod of confirmation, Makoto gently helped him wash out his mouth and check over his teeth, which had filed into small points that were deceptively sharp, and make sure his tongue was still in one piece. During his inspection, Kuroo returned to the bath room, with shirt, to let them know the teams were under Ennoshita and Nobayuki’s watch and they were ready to take Makoto to meet the coaches, who were due back soon.

“You’re good to go Hinata-kun. Well, if you could go anywhere.” Grimacing at his own joke, Makoto stood and slung his bag over his shoulder.

“I’ll be back to check on him again, sometimes Haru’s grants have other effects.” Nodding to Suga and Yaku, he followed Kuroo out the door. Suga excused himself for a moment, going to get Hinata something to do while he waited provided he would be very careful around the water.

Silence followed for a few moments after Suga slipped out the door.

“I-“

“Hinata, I swear if you say you’re sorry again I’m feeding you to the newest cat Lev rescued. It’s very fond of fish I hear.” Yaku’s tone sent shivers up Hinata’s spine and he shrunk below the edge of the tub until his eyes just poked over the top to look at the libero.

“...yes Yaku-san.”

Suga came back with to Yaku massaging his temples and Hinata warily watching him from the tub.

\--

“It was a shock at first but it’s really cool you have a tail Shouyou!”

Noya and Tanaka’s animated chatter mostly kept up Hina’s spirits during the lunch break. His tail swished lazily in the water as he sat on the edge next to Noya, giggling at his rendition of something that had happened once drills began.

He sighed, setting the tray they had brought off to the side and sliding waist-deep back into the water, stopping Noya in the middle of his sentence. It had been a story about how a blocked ball had ricocheted rather than been received across five people causing three bloody noses and almost a black eye before coming to a stop.

“Shouyou?”

“Sorry Noya-san, I was feeling a little dry.” Grimacing, Hinata raised his hands and laced his fingers together as far as he could, staring up through the translucent webbing strung between them.

“It’s pretty cool, but not when I could be playing volleyball. Aaaah, if I had known this would happen I would have just wished for something different.”

“Like what?”

“I dunno, being taller maybe? Winning the Spring High? To be able to catch a ball one handed?”

He ducked his head under the rest of the way, staring up at Nishinoya through the ripples of water that were disturbed as he let out the last bubbles of air from his lungs, gills having taken over.

‘ _What would you have wished for instead?’_

\--

Inuoka brought him dinner, grilled mackerel and rice as the ritual said, and was cheerful as ever as they ate together. At the same time, he also seemed slightly more apologetic and looking as though he had been thoroughly chastised whenever he did so. When Makoto reappeared to check over Hinata again, Inuoka got up to take their dishes back. Before he left, he stuck his head in once more.

“We are still friends right, Shouyou?”

“Of course!”

\--

“The water is alive, the water is alive, the water is alive.” Hinata sank beneath the water’s surface once more, starting the countdown to when the merman would arrive.

“Please let this work.” Daichi mumbled, stifling a yawn behind a fist. Suga nodded and they watched in awe as the water rippled and glowed. From the swirling liquid formed the merman-Haru, scales shimmering like the water of the bath and skin as pale as the moonlight.

Hina’s head broke the surface and they met eye to eye.

“You call me once more.”

“I have a new wish.”

“Very well. Let me hear your wish, child of the sun and the skies.”

“I wish to return to being human again. Being part lucifer dogfish is cool, but playing volleyball with my teammates is cooler.”

“This is what you wish?”

Hinata nodded and the blank faced merman nodded. Once more he withdrew the vial from the netting surrounding his waist and put a single drop in the middle of Hinata’s forehead.

“Close your eyes and concentrate on your wish.”

Hinata obeyed and lowered his head slightly as the merman slowly began to trickle the water over his head. From their position, Daichi and Suga could see the water glow in his palms, sparkling as it dripped down over Hinata’s head. When it was gone, they had to be bodily held back by Makoto when Hinata began to seize and thrash in pain. Water soared up and formed a sphere around the two, rendering their view to only the silhouettes.

The water orb slowly began to run itself down, and when it was gone, so was the merman and Hinata lay still, floating in the bath and breathing softly. Only then did Makoto let them go, helping lift Hinata out of the tub and dry him off. Daichi began mopping up the spilled water on the floor as Suga drained the tub. Makoto worked on getting Hinata dressed with the long practice of being the older brother in charge of dressing sleepy or asleep younger siblings.

 “Daichi…Is the bathtub sparkling to you?”

“Sparkling…?”

Makoto groaned and would have face palmed were it not for the armful of Hinata he had.

“Nagisa must have stolen one of Rei’s bath bombs and given it to Haru-chan.” Looking down to Hinata, he sighed out an “I’m so sorry. I’ll help clean it out if you need.”

They waved him off and headed for the Karasuno room. “Don’t mind Tachibana-san, if it’s that bad it’ll be punishment duty for whoever gets a little too rambunctious tomorrow.”

Daichi slid the door open and held up the cover for Makoto to lay Hinata down on the futon.

“Not that it’ll last, but it’s the thought that counts. Good night Tachibana-san, you remember where you’re sleeping?”

“That I do, thank you Sawamura-kun. Good night.” Makoto carefully tip toed his way back to the door and out, shutting it quietly behind him. Daichi and Suga sighed in relief and picked their way to their own sleeping spots, crawling in and falling to their own dreams and sleep.

\--

“Ggh-! Get off me dumbass!”

Suga lifted his head from his pillow to look in the direction of the voice that had finally pulled him from his sleep. Hinata had rolled into Kageyama and was sprawled across him, one leg across Kageyama’s hips, the other hooked around the leg Kageyama had kicked free from the blanket. He had his arms wrapped around both his own pillow and one of Kageyama’s arms, which no doubt was trying to form a fist to punch Hinata awake. He probably would have with the other had Tanaka’s head not taken up residence on Kageyama’s forearm, leg sprawled over his last free limb. Suga stifled a fit of giggles, Noya’s head pinning down Kageyama’s shoulder was the cherry on top of the cupcake.

“Oho? It appears the king has been taken captive by a trio of peasants. How disgracing it must be.”

“Good morning to you too Tsukishima.” Kageyama growled out, trying to free his arm without actually hurting his sempai currently using it for a pillow. Hinata he had fewer qualms about but the degree to which he was being clung to made bodily harm a little hard at the moment. Lifting his head the fraction he could without dislodging Noya, Kageyama gave Suga a pleading look, mouth working to form the words to ask for help.

Suga nodded, still trying to stifle giggles behind one hand. He shook Asahi awake and had him move Noya back to his futon. Untangling Tanaka was made easier when he woke up because Asahi brushed against a ticklish spot on his side. Hinata took a little more work, still firmly asleep, but they had Kageyama out and fumbling over a ‘thanks’

“Alright, someone wake up the rest so we can clean up and head to breakfast! The managers promised something good today!” Daichi commanded, stepping in from the hall and observing the room.

“Yes captain!”

He smiled as the team got to work waking their remaining members and starting to task. Everything was back to normal.

“Wake up dumbass!”

“GWA! I’m gonna bite you Bakageyama! I was having a really nice dream!”

“A pity it wasn’t yesterday, then you really would have done some damage.”

“Shut up Tsukishima or I’ll bite your nose off!”

“Can you even reach?”

Hinata hissed and launched himself at Tsukishima who dodged, sending Hinata colliding into Asahi who yelped and tripped forward, just barely being ‘caught’ by Noya who fell back with an ‘oof’. Hinata’s sprawling legs almost tripped Kinoshita were it not for Ennoshita pulling him out of the way. As soon as he could scramble back up Hinata was on his feet and hissing at Tsukishima once again as the taller continued to dodge the furious swipes that Hinata made until Suga was able to pinch both of their ears and begin scolding.

Daichi sighed and rectified his previous statement. Things were as normal as they got for the Karasuno Volleyball Club.

**Author's Note:**

> Still not sorry.   
> Where's the owls you ask? Good question, I don't know where they went either. We should probably find them.  
> Hope you liked it!


End file.
